Painful!

had been home the whole day. having terrible backaches. on the phone with bian bian almost the whole day. i was with my attitude again for the second or the third time round. BIAN BIAN HAD BEEN TOLERATING ME AND NOT EVEN FLARE UP FOR ONCE. why are you always accomodating me even though i hurt you so deeply? and you even *****, with all those harsh-ful words again. you didnt really did something really wrong and you keep apologising when im at fault. AM I REALLY COMPAITABLE TO YOU? i really had no confidence. YOU MUST HAVE GREAT DISAPPOINTMENT IN ME. you even came and leave my place without a word and left the patches outside my door. you are still so caring even though all those things that happened. really regretted what i did. 我为什么每次做了才后悔? 总是不想想后果呢?